time marches on…

Lauren & Kyle highchairs

OK – So I’m still supposed to be on my “summer sabbatical” from all social media. But I’m kinda sad today… and I just needed to tell someone. So I’ll make it quick. Then it doesn’t really count…?

After a restless night’s sleep, I awakened with this gnawing, empty feeling way down in my gut that only a mom would know. It was that helpless feeling of time marching on; whether you agreed to be part of the band… or not. You see, my babies turned 23 today. Without me. Yep – The very first time that they have been away from us on their birthday. Now before you start telling me all of that logical, “after all, they are ADULTS now“, baloney, let me just say right up front that I get all that. I, honestly, could not be more proud of the adult children that we have raised. We feel that we have been mightily blessed and thank God for them each and every day. xo

But moms ~~want~~ need to feel needed sometimes… Ok, maybe all the time? I dunno. It varies. My sister and I were talking on the phone last night about this very thing. We complain about having to drive them all around town when they are little… here, there and everywhere. Some days are endless. Then they go off and get their driver’s license. That’s great news, right? Sure it is. Until that moment when you wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat realizing that they don’t need you to drive them anywhere… anymore. Time marches on. Your job there is done.

You see, the heart is not the brain. These two body parts operate quite independently of one another. There is logic, and then there is love. In my logical brain, I am so happy for them today. They are with each other, and they are with good friends. Everything is exactly the way it should be; and this is good. Time marches on.

But deep in my soul, they will always be my babies… and today, selfishly, my heart aches like crazy.

live happy ~ Cathy

a birthday to remember??

5 / 5 / 13

When I was writing my May newsletter, I mentioned how much I loved May. And springtime. And flowers. The grass is green, the trees are budding, the warm sunshine a welcome reward after a cold, never-ending winter. I feel especially blessed to have a May birthday. May 2 to be exact.

I awakened on my birthday to the sound of our local weather forecaster, Joel, sharing the good news for the day; “An absolutely miserable day ahead…drizzly, dreary, raw raindrops…” Wait – Did he just say RAW raindrops? What the heck…?? He was, obviously, confused. This is May, and May is warm and “springy”. There was only one thing to do. Change the channel.

Well – looking on the bright side (huh?) – It appears we have very accurate weather forecasters here in Kansas City (on “KMBC”; Channel 9. And BTW – Just kidding about changing the channel – TeeHee!) Yep – They were spot on. “Raw” was certainly an appropriate adjective to describe the moisture that was falling from that dark, dreary (May) sky. All. Day. Long. By afternoon, my “Happy Birthday” songs, via family phone calls, had joined chorus with a rather unique style of “background music”… the ping, ping, ping of sleet and ice pellets whipping against the window. This sleet and ice soon turned to (gulp!) SNOW… at which point I declared that my birthday had been officially postponed.

Once that had been decided, we settled in for a cozy evening at home. It had been a crazy couple of days full of unexpected surprises; so a warm blanket, a glass of wine, a fire in the fireplace and an episode of Downton Abbey was just what the (birthday) doctor ordered. Especially when there is a winter weather advisory. In May. At the end of the night, the hubbie had an idea. We went outside and “wrote” the date, 5-2-13, in the snow as documentation… of a birthday to remember. And just the beginning of what (obviously) promises to be a very exciting year!!!

my “lovely” friend; alice

4 / 2 / 134 / 2 / 15

(A repost from exactly two years ago… With love. To you, Alice. I miss you today xoxo)

Today would have been my lovely friend, Alice’s, birthday. April 2. My birthday falls on May 2. We celebrated our birthdays together in 1987 and 1988.

Unfortunately, that was all the time we were blessed with…

We moved to London in the fall of 1986 for a (short… way too short) two year adventure with my husband’s accounting firm. Knowing that I only had a very limited period of time, I decided that the best way to do things was to jump in feet first; and ask questions later. So that’s exactly what I did. “Getting cozy” with the Brits, however, was a rather daunting task. It was much easier to develop friendships with the New Zealanders, Aussies and the other Americans. The British are, overall, a bit more distant and hard to get to know. And I am the first to admit that my personality might be a bit “over the top” for them. Regardless, I decided to venture out of the old “comfort zone”. We had been attending mass in a massive English cathedral… cold and dark and full of gold and stained glass. “Cozy” is not exactly the word that I am going for here. I decided to pursue some volunteer work through the church. I made some contacts, and before I knew it, I had a slip of paper in my hand with two names, addresses and telephone numbers. They were “older women” who might welcome a visit or two. One of the names scribbled on that piece of paper….was Alice.

I phoned her “straightaway” and made arrangements to stop by for tea. Her flat was down a quiet little cobblestone street near “Marble Arch” in the heart of London. I knocked, the door opened… and, in that very moment, a friendship began. Yes; Really. Just like that. We started out setting specific times and dates for my visits. But as the friendship deepened, we started having “impromptu” visits between visits! I would phone her to see if perhaps I might stop by for a quick visit. “That would be lovely”, she would say. She loved the word “lovely”. Not once did she turn me away. And they were not usually quick visits, either – ha! We would just sit and talk for hours. Alice had lost her husband many years prior and had no children. Her closest relative was a niece (and her family) who lived outside of London, but she didn’t really get together with them very often. I knew that my visits meant the world to her. Truth is, they meant the world to me, as well.

Alice would leave the front door open when she knew that I was on the way. I would let myself in, and from the moment that I stepped inside that tiny, dimly lit, cozy little flat – it was like my heart coming home. If I close my eyes I can still remember everything like it was yesterday… the sound of the teacups and saucers clanking against the tray as she made her way

to the tiny little kitchen table… the scent of freshly brewed tea and something warm from the oven… sometimes the soft little purr of a kitty that also called Alice “home”. Alice had a frail little body, crooked fingers, soft golden white hair and a tiny little voice. Her eyes would sparkle when I entered the room with a love that was, indeed, mutual; and shared between the two of us. We were separated by many, many years; it’s true. But we were kindred spirits; friends of the heart. It was a gift, and I think that we both knew that we were blessed in the moment. We treasured those moments up until the very, very end. Leaving Alice felt like I was ripping out a piece of my heart and leaving it there in London… Indeed I was.

Upon returning to the states, we kept our promise to each other to write often. Those letters meant the world to me. Sometimes I would even call her just to say a quick “hi” and hear her voice. I still remember calling to tell her that I was pregnant with twins and she was going to be a “grandma”… xo! She was SO excited and just kept saying how “lovely” that was… her favorite word!! She started making plans to come to the United States after they were born. “Nothing would make me happier”, I told her.

I still remember the day the letter came.

It was from her niece. I sat down. I started crying before I even opened it. “Auntie Alice” had passed away peacefully in her sleep. She knew that I would want to know. She had found my letters, along with my address, there next to her bed. She thanked me for being such a special person in her “auntie’s” life. Wow. “Ever had a memory that sneaks out of your eye, and rolls down your cheek…?”

If a yellow rose is the symbol of friendship, perhaps those are the tears of missing a friend…

So today, Alice, I am thinking about you with my whole heart… I brewed a pot of tea, selected my favorite little floral teacup and saucer and put some quiet music on to help me write this post. So many memories are running through my mind. It truly feels like you are right here with me. I know you are. There were tears in my eyes as I wrote this entire blog post, but they flowed uncontrollably as I attempted to type that last paragraph… I still miss you so much. I always will. I realize, however, that I am so very, very lucky to have been blessed with such love. “Missing someone isn’t about how long it’s been since you’ve seen them or the amount of time since you’ve talked. It’s about that very moment when you’re doing something and wishing they were right there with you.” Oh, Alice; If only heaven weren’t so far away…. Happy Birthday, my dear friend.

a barbie birthday

3 / 10 / 13

So Barbie turned 54 yesterday. Gosh. Just the word “Barbie” brings back an incredible flood of memories. All good. Summer memories of entire glorious days spent playing Barbies. Sun up to sun down, over in the side yard with my next door neighbor and my sister. Pure bliss, I tell you. Yes, if good ole’ Babs were here sipping coffee with me this morning, I would say, “Thank you. I loved you. I was obsessed with you”. Let me also say that this was a pretty common thing for many, many girls my age. And speaking of “my age”… Let’s just say that Babs and I have a close connection. In age. She was “born” in 1959; I was born in 1961. I’m fairly certain that our lives would have crossed paths. After all; who knows, right? Our kids may have been friends. We certainly could have been neighbors. In the same Bunco group, perhaps? Ya – Barbie and I probably would have been Brownie and Cub Scout leaders together. Pretty sure about that one. Well… other than the fact that Barbie had quite a few careers to juggle throughout the years. Let’s see; she was a princess, firefighter, cowgirl, Paleontologist, pop singer, NASCAR driver, car burglar, jet pilot in the Air Force, waitress, astronaut, olympic gymnast and ran for president of the United States four times. And that’s the short list. See more HERE. So I’m thinking maybe the scout co-leader thing is out. Just sayin’.

And so Babs and I are now in our 50’s. Personally, I am just gonna say that the “50’s” absolutely rock!! There is a certain sense of self awareness and confidence unlike any decade prior. It’s that “Like it, or not, I am who I am. The end.” Love that. What I don’t love, however, are some of the other little “goodies” that seem to catch up with you in your 40’s & 50’s… Ann Brenoff, from the Huffington Post, captured those sentiments in an article honoring Barbie’s birthday – “Barbie, Your Roots are Showing”. I encourage you to click on and read the entire article – but here is just a portion of Ann’s article…

“Barbie, the missile-breasted doll who never ages, actually turns 54 today. And while it’s not one of those milestone birthdays — the ones that end in a 0 or a 5 — we think we know how she’s feeling about this one.

But Babs? She definitely is hanging in there. For one, Barbie has always had that stiletto heel thing down pat (remember: This is the doll who wore them to go sky-diving), although we suspect that in real life, 54-year-old Barbie kicks those suckers off as soon as she gets home and secretly wishes that comfort shoes weren’t so damn ugly. We are pretty certain she’s asked her publicist to get rid of those Web photos of her wearing Naturalizers, but wouldn’t it be nice if someone, somewhere could make a stylish shoe for women with bunions? Yep, Barbie’s got bunions. (You can see them if you look really, really hard at her permanently arched tiny feet. Try drinking wine first; it helps you see doll bunions.)

And I think we all know what real-life Barbie doesn’t want for her birthday: A cashmere sweater. Just looking at sweaters, especially turtlenecks, triggers her hot flashes. She tried hormones — hoping that they’d improve her memory too since she is always losing those damn little shoes of hers into the carpet — but the weight gain was more than she could handle.

The good news is that, at 54, Barbie very much still wants to work. Rumor has it that she’s introducing a line of reading glasses for all the little girls who grew up playing with her.”

Ouch. That hurts, doesn’t it, Babs.

barbie on telephone — Click HERE to see a collector who has over 2000 Barbies lining his wall… a clip from “Good morning America”

barbie lunchbox — Yep. The year was 1967 and this was my FAV lunchbox/thermos EVER!

a dr. seuss birthday

3 / 2 / 13

rainbow cookies — “Dr. Seuss Cookies” Rainbow Pinwheel Cookies Click for link to Souders Cookery blog & cookie recipe

Oh my… who doesn’t have memories of Dr. Seuss… Anyone? I think not. “The Grinch”, “Red Fish, Blue Fish”, “Green Eggs & Ham”. Just hearing those words sends a rush of memories cascading through my “maternal mind“… Two sweet little buddies curled up on my lap, snuggled under the covers to read a nighttime book (or two…) before “nighty-night”. A memory so warm and close I can practically touch it. But those “little buddies” of mine have moved on to other books… Accounting & Finance and Anatomy & Chemistry. And with my son at 6’1″, curling up on my lap is probably out of the question. No worries. Plenty of nieces and nephews keep the bookshelf dust from accumulating; and I know in my heart that (someday) God will bless me with some little “Grandbuddies” of my own for snuggling and spoiling and baking Dr. Seuss cookies – all in due time. So today we celebrate our beloved Dr.Seuss; born on March 2nd 1904, some 109 years ago. As a tribute – a “Birthday Poem“, written Dr.Seuss himself!! A man wise beyond his years. He will live forever in our hearts, both young and old. Dr. Seuss – we thank you. live happy… laugh, love, dream, create

Happy Birthday To You!

“If we didn’t have birthdays,

you wouldn’t be you.

If you’d never been born,

well then what would you do?

If you’d never been born,

well then what would you be?

You might be a fish!

Or a toad in a tree!

You might be a doorknob!

Or three baked potatoes!

You might be a bag full of

hard green tomatoes.”

“Or worse than all that…Why,

you might be a WASN’T!

A Wasn’t has no fun at all.

No, he doesn’t.

A Wasn’t just isn’t.

He just isn’t present.

But you…You ARE YOU!

And, now isn’t that pleasant!”

“Today you are you!

That is truer than true!

There is no one alive…

…who is you-er than you!

Shout loud, “I am lucky

to be what I am!

Thank goodness I’m not

just a clam or a ham

Or a dusty old jar of

sour gooseberry jam!

I am what I am! That’s a

great thing to be!

If I say so myself,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

“just do it”

6 / 24 / 12

I turned fifty just over a year ago. Let me just tell you right now, I love it!! That year between fifty and fifty-one was one of the most important years of my life, so far. It was the year that I began the process of “re-discovering myself”. Since I plan to continue this procees well into my 100’s, I’m about halfway there. Plenty of time.

For a long, long time, I played around with the ideas of taking my business, Creations, in a fresh new direction. I dreamed of “following my passion”; a shabby chic with a French accent kind of direction. But, Oh my… all the changes that I would need to make!! New logo, business cards, website and – Oh ya – how about all new merchandise?! So there I was, one random day, in the middle of that glorious year of awakening. I just decided that the moment was NOW. So I did it. No regrets.

I love cooking and healthy eating. This is a good thing. I hate exercise. This is a bad thing. Went to a presentation on “healthy lifestyles” from a gal who knows what she is talking about – Mitzi Dulan. She speaks all over the country and is very well known in her industry and beyond. She also teaches “Boot Camp“. OK, let’s be honest here. Me going to Boot Camp is so far out of the box that the box is in Russia. But there I was, all “50 something” and ~~crazy~~ confident, so I grabbed a friend (love ya, Deb!), and we did it. Four weeks, every Monday, Wednesday and Friday from 9:00-10:00. After the first day, my friend Deb and I were certain that we were dying. It hurt to lift my pinky finger. As one of my kids said, “there’s a reason why they call it Boot Camp, Mom”. Yep. There sure is. Crazy as it sounds, we even did a second session! I have to say – I was so proud of myself. Besides the physical benefits, there was that deep sense of accomplishment that comes from doing the impossible. And trust me – I saw Boot Camp as Impossible. Capital “I”.

And so the positive wave of my “50’s” continues. More changes. Some baby steps, some much bigger. I turned 51 in May, and I am already planning my 100th Birthday Party, so consider this blog your “save the date” card… May 2061. In the meantime; Enjoy every day. As Nike says… “Just do it”!! live happy… laugh, love, dream, create